VIEW from the BLEACHERS
My personal search for signs of intelligent life in the universe and in my neighborhood
A humor blog
by Tim Jones, BA, JD, MBA, ESQ, FAQ, INC, LOL, WTF, UBU, IDK, ETC
For the 2020 season, the NFL will commence another regular football season. But there won’t be very much that will be “regular” about it. Here are just a few changes you’ll be seeing this year, thanks to COVID.
Recently I’ve been experiencing a lot of stress in my life. So, I decided to purchase a meditation / relaxation CD to help me relax and clear out my mind. But I have to say, I’ve been listening to it. And I don’t think it’s actually helping. In fact, I think it’s making things worse. Not sure why.
Recently, President Trump’s campaign has been struggling to come up with a new campaign slogan for his 2020 re-election bid. He can’t use Make America Great Again because, well, he’s already accomplished that bigly. So, I have done some brainstorming and come up with a list of possible Trump 2020 campaign slogans.
Lately, I’ve had difficulty sleeping at night. I either have a bad case of Restless Leg Syndrome or an epic case of the Harlem Shakes. Friends have offered countless suggestions for how to get a restful night’s sleep. None of them have worked so far. But a buddy swears he knows a surefire cure: Drink a fifth of Tequila while watching the film Weekend at Bernie’s in the nude.
The successful use of face masks against the Covid pandemic has inspired scientists and public health professionals to look at further applications of mask technology to prevent the spread of other dangerous human expulsions across a wide array of personal interactions. In this issue, we look at just a few of the exciting new mask applications currently under development.
Recently, the controversy over the name of the Washington Redskins NFL team has gained momentum. Many people feel the term “Redskins” paints a racially demeaning stereotype of Native Americans. So, I have come up with a way to solve this problem once and for all. No need to thank me.
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