VIEW from the BLEACHERS
A humor blog
by Tim Jones, BA, JD, MBA, ESQ, FAQ, INC, LOL, WTF, UBU, IDK, ETC
Let’s Eat Grandma – and Other Abominations of the English Language
When constructing a sentence, it’s important to pay attention to proper spelling and punctuation. Take the simple declarative sentence, “Let’s eat, Grandma!” Oh, what a profound difference a missing comma can make. Every day, I browse social media or read emails where someone has catastrophically misspelled a commonly used word, completely butchered a classic truism, or otherwise treated English grammar like a rental car.
Trump Renames the World
Following an Executive Order that officially renamed Lake Ontario “Lake America” – a direct response to being rebuffed by Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney during trade talks – President Donald Trump has announced an ambitious new international initiative: re-branding the entire planet. Leaked documents provided to The New York Times reveal several upcoming cartographic adjustments. Here are a few of them.
Gerber Adult Baby Food – and Other Epic Marketing Disasters
Most Business marketing experts study successful product launches like the iPhone, the Amazon Echo, or my personal favorite – the wheel. Not me. As one of America’s leading self-proclaimed marketing and brand management experts, I prefer to examine the spectacular, crater-sized smoking holes left in the market by history’s greatest commercial flops.
Living in a Looney Tunes World
There we were, glaring at each other awkwardly. I had foolishly suggested that my 30-year-old daughter spend an hour watching classic Looney Tunes on YouTube, fondly remembering the Saturday mornings of my youth wrapped in a blanket, eating sugary cereal, and laughing until my ribs ached. I genuinely thought we’d bond over it. I was wrong. Very wrong.
Warning Signs Your Spouse Might Be a Birder
Is your spouse at risk of turning into a birder? Look for these telltale signs: It may start innocently enough, when your husband points out a hawk circling overhead. Then he purchases a bird feeder. Then before you know it, he’s waking up at 4:15 AM on a Saturday, covered in camo netting, to sit in a swamp, hoping to catch a glimpse of a breeding pair of North American White-Crested Sapsuckers. By then it may be too late to save your marriage.
Say What? The Hearing-Impaired Game Show Contestant
Wilbur Deffinear is a retired construction worker with really bad hearing. Somehow he ended up on a game show and believe it or not, he did incredibly well.
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Give Someone Special the Very Best of View from the Bleachers
A collection of Tim Jones' all-time funniest View from the Bleachers articles he’s written over the years.
Recent posts
Let’s Eat Grandma – and Other Abominations of the English Language- Trump Renames the World
- Gerber Adult Baby Food – and Other Epic Marketing Disasters
- Living in a Looney Tunes World
- Warning Signs Your Spouse Might Be a Birder
- Say What? The Hearing-Impaired Game Show Contestant
- BREAKING WEATHER ALERT: Seattle Braces for Extremely Mild, Pleasant July Weather
- Why Most Cats Suck at Pickleball
- BREAKING HEALTH ALERT: Ice Cream Declared Superfood — Kale Classified as Biohazard
- COVID: Now Even More Contagious Than Your Aunt Linda’s Gossip – And Just As Unavoidable
YOU'RE GROUNDED FOR LIFE
Read this hysterically funny book about Tim Jones's many parenting failures -- Sure to make you feel like Parent of the Year by comparison.
