Comments on: I just found out I’m related to Jesus – on my mother’s side

By: Ron

Ron — Tue, 21 May 2013 17:36:56 +0000

this made me laugh, i then showed it to my dad, who was then told by “Jesus” scold me and call me an athiest

By: The age of Disposable Penis, Oops, Pope and I | elcidharth

The age of Disposable Penis, Oops, Pope and I | elcidharth — Sat, 23 Feb 2013 19:39:46 +0000

[...] wrote a blog post recently establishing with convincing evidence that I may in fact be directly descended from Jesus, on my mother’s side. Who else among the Papal wannabees can make that [...]

By: Rumor Has It I May Be The Next Pope? - Redneck 'N' Paradise

Rumor Has It I May Be The Next Pope? - Redneck 'N' Paradise — Sat, 23 Feb 2013 06:58:47 +0000

By: » Rumor has it I may be the next Pope

» Rumor has it I may be the next Pope — Thu, 21 Feb 2013 15:30:18 +0000

By: » Humor writer admits to using banned substances and lying to everybody

» Humor writer admits to using banned substances and lying to everybody — Sun, 20 Jan 2013 17:12:01 +0000

[...] noticing that my blog posts were getting increasingly unhinged. When I claimed in one post that I was a direct descendant of Jesus, it raised a lot of eyebrows. When I later wrote that I was contemplating switching my vote to [...]

By: Betsy

Betsy — Sat, 20 Oct 2012 01:30:29 +0000

Before I embrace this mind-boggling news, it is imperative that you address a few concerns I have with your claim. First, Jesus, being a devout Jew, would not likely have requested pepperoni pizza, as pepperoni comes from porky the pig – specifically, its butt. Secondly, you say that Megan is Mary’s younger sister; that would make her Jesus’ aunt. THAT is the woman he married? I think not! She would be much too old for Jesus. Thirdly, as the Da Vinci Code accurately points out, Jesus was indeed married and his female descendants were to be revered. That means that your younger sister – whom you failed to mention – would be more highly esteemed than you. I suggest you correct these egregious errors NOW! Or I’m gonna tell mom!

By: Drew Fisher

Drew Fisher — Fri, 19 Oct 2012 16:16:14 +0000

Once again, I am in awe of the quality of original research on this website. Funny, I would have imagined that Jesus’ wife would have been Martha, the fanatical homemaker mentioned in Luke 10:40. 10:40? Wow. That links her to Matthew, the accountant. Must have been his wife. And what about that book whose title I forget that scandalized all believing Christians a few years ago that says he married Mary Magdalene the hooker and they escaped with their kid in a boat to Spain? Think of all the Hispanic kids named Jesus! I’m sure your findings will be greeted by the established church with great enthusiasm, and you’re a shoo-in for the one-million-pound Templeton Prize for Progress Toward Research or Discoveries About Spiritual Realities. Or you’ll be burned at the stake, one or the other. Anyway, as no less an authority than Paul the Apostle once wrote, “If you explain these things to the brothers and sisters, Timothy, you will be a worthy servant…”

By: Seth A. Greenblatt, Ph.D., Scientific Biblical Scholar

Seth A. Greenblatt, Ph.D., Scientific Biblical Scholar — Fri, 19 Oct 2012 05:38:56 +0000

Tim, this is amazing news! I was thinking. You are related to Jesus, who was Jewish, on your mother’s side. Hmmm, Congratulations, Tim, you’re Jewish!!! Now, as to the 3%, it matters what 3% of you is from the bloodline. Cuts and scrapes, properly placed, could really dig into your 3%, over time. Then that trauma that Jewish boys endure not long after birth can shave quite a lot off your percentage, more of a problem for some than others…

So, Mazel Tov!!!